Rides:- 266/267.
28 April 2007. The Second Annual Klaeng Klassic BJ Resort was the site of the 2nd Annual Klaeng Klassic. Yes, the pool was overgrown with green scum and was subsequently emptied and refilled, and, yes, the rickety wooden sidewalks were just a lawsuit away from someone falling through the rotted planks, but the monkey bridge was still open for monkey business and BJ’s provided us that element of adventure all Bike Hashers crave. The Hares, David and Martin, promised us a 35 K-ish Hash with a hardcore 6 K section in the middle. About 80 riders pedaled off under overcast skies, but they didn’t last—the sun came out along with the humidity. Since we were all sweating so profusely, it was really nice of the Hares to plan a river crossing in the first section for us to cool off. There were sufficient checks to give everyone a chance to catch up on chit-chat and exchange recipes while the die-hards went right, left, forward and back to find the trail. It gave the group a chance to appreciate the scenic orchards while some took the opportunity to stuff their bike shorts with rambutan and mangosteen, snacks for later. Up and down rolling hills we rode, past a beautiful reservoir to the first water stop at roughly 15 K. The next section gave the physically fit a chance to churn up and down hills. It gave the rest of us a chance to practice mountain bike hiking. “That which does not kill us, makes us stronger” became my mantra. I particularly enjoyed the adrenaline rush I got as I fell off my bike and continued my descent down hill on foot hopeful that I was a slightly faster runner than my trailing bike. There was a report that 2 guys made the entire middle section ON their bikes, but rumors have not been confirmed or denied. The Hares very kindly provided a 2nd water stop before the very enjoyable 3rd section, about 14 K through tapioca and pineapple plantations and past the occasional barking dog. We also rode through forests of trees being tapped. Point of clarification for our Canadian friends: that white goo is rubber, not maple syrup. In the Circle, the ride got a 7.5 rating, the Hares were berated in the usual fashion, returners were welcomed back, and we tolerated the surge in French visitors (who escaped in the dark of night as they were not seen on the Sunday ride). Diana, the RA, was harassed by Chris for her headlight imitation, but she got back at him and those who broke her Code of Conduct. Fashion faux pas was noted: Business Casual Friday attire does NOT work on bike hashes. Glen managed to get his tent set up just before the big downpour and Stephanie managed to keep dry by creating a fashionable raincoat out of the hotel room curtain. No stinkin’ rain could keep the exhausted, but hungry Hashers from the delicious meal where BBQ’d shish kabobs and freshly cooked phad Thai were served along with a great buffet and cold beer. As per usual, the stage entertainment was excellent with some fancy dancing to the music. We were happy to see Gay arrive after being lost in the wilderness, ditched by her boyfriend, Chris. Note to all: please review Code of Conduct and how that applies to leaving spouses, significant others, children, and spouses in the dust. Payback is hell. The sunny Sunday ride was a gentle 20 K ride with lots of big muddy puddles perfect for Hash Splash. It was noted, however, that there was excessive splashing on the ride which was dealt with in the Circle, later. There were also several serious reports of plant abuse, both in the tapioca and pineapple fields. It is hoped that the Agent Orange being sprayed near the first false trail will not cause any serious side effects or health problems. My pedal
broke at the first check, so I have no idea what the real hash was like, but
boy did I have an interesting time getting back to BJ. Some things I noted: Since I didn’t actually ride the last 15 K, I’m guessing it went something like this: false trail, check, hashers milling around hoping someone else is looking for the trail, rolling hills, puddles, splash, crash, check, whistles, water stop, more gravel, occasional hard surface, plantations, fruit trees, more puddles, more splashes, more crashes, and on in. Rides #266 and #267 are history. Our muscles are aching and we have a few more scrapes, bug bites, and muddy clothes to wash, but a good time was had by all at the Klaeng Klassic! Your KK Scribe, Maren Smith |
